#sareespeak #womenofsareespeak

#165 #SS 11/2022 #organza

Disclaimer. An immensely long post.

Describing saree first as it will get lost in the Ramble below.
Draped a lime green and yellow chiffon organza with gold borders and gold checks over the weekend. Gifted to D1 by Kirithika Kiki during a Navarathri and the saree is now “mine”.
A happy content saree to align with my settled state of mind.
PC : Husband.

Last week was an emotion packed week.
An uncle passing away (in next post).
My final week at a job I loved.
8 years.
Had farewells from the southern and head office.
Beautifully lovingly organized.
Flowers. Food. Songs. A comedic production about The Girl Who Just Wouldn’t Go Home.
(No prizes for guessing who the protagonist was – I’d disrupted their planning meetings for the Farewell by not leaving their offices, so much so, there were messages sent to each other “I’m hiding upstairs. Tell me when she’s left”. 😄 and friends hiding in store rooms when I knocked on their doors and entered their rooms).
Tuesday was the day of the South office’s farewell. A huge bouquet of flowers, swamped with speeches from my manager and wonderful colleagues, great brunch and love. Very emotional.
Friday was the Adaptive Tech/Comms Team and Head office final farewell. Some of my awesome team had come down from other parts of the country. Trays, Hampers of Eastern, Western goodies, flowers, balloons, shawl, candles, speeches, a theatrical production and my lovely team mate, Karen, sang a bhajan as she presented me with a tray of candles, flowers, incense..
A tradition in our team is to gift a leaver, outdated IT equipment. I was gifted an oldddd Nokia pink flip top button phone with a small wooden male doll. To depict the android accessibility icon that appears at the bottom right of the smart phone screen when accessibility settings are tweaked. And they iterated my famous words, which I used to proclaim, with a mischievous grin to the lady client, while watching her husband’s face 🤓, “Now, just touch that little man on the bottom right, and touch anything on the screen to get it read aloud”. That would invariably cause loud laughter.
My ex manager was on a video call and she watched the whole farewell meeting and gave a heartwarming speech.
So much..Too much..Couldn’t post, these few days as I was processing it all..Still am..
Went for a lunch at our standard Thai restaurant. My first team dinner 8 years ago and my final one.
Gave a speech.
I spoke of how blessed and grateful I was to have had a glorious 8 years of service. Why I was leaving. I spoke of how the TV series New Amsterdam resonated with me when the selfless medical director asks “How can I help? How can I make things better?”, how to see clients, colleagues as people and not dollar signs.
Cliched? Cheesy?
But oh so true and so needed..
I spoke of how it’d never felt like work, how each colleague brought something special to the team,
Reproducing the gist of my speech here..

“Thank you for a blessed glorious 8 years here.
I am immensely grateful that I got to work here.
My last day here is..
and I start at my new place on..
This career move has come at a welcome time when my husband and I have become empty nesters.

I have had a colourful, interesting time here – using long drop toilets with a pig at my feet with no toilet door; getting stuck in mud for more than 5 hours, contemplating whether to use the bush toilet but fearing that the tow truck would miraculously shine its headlights on my misdoings; driving up Route 306 in a hurry as the GPS had taken me to Manaia Road in Tairua instead of a similar sounding Road in Manaia.

I have giggled with clients over the little man at the bottom right of their phone, watching the husband’s eyes widen as I ask the wife to touch the little man; laughed aloud at Siri’s and Google’s weird sense of humour and their wry dry jokes.

Every day when I set out for work, drive along Chapel Road/Manukau Heights and Brown’s Road, usually speeding a little because I am most often fashionably late, I say a silent Thank You, a prayer if you will, for being able to go to work that is rewarding, enriching and which does not feel like work at all.

In the early years of my career, at uni and at my other jobs, I used to get a high, a buzz from sorting a bug in a program, completing an IT project, or seeing students or clients understand what I’d taught. I get that same buzz here when I’ve had a client achieving goals or even when they know that there is some light at the end of the tunnel.

As I leave today, I would like to stress that
there is no such thing as coincidence. We are here or wherever we are because we are meant to be. Brought together for common good. Each of us have a gift. We are not just Orientation & Mobility instructors O&Ms, Adaptive Tech Comms ACATS instructors or whatever tags and labels have been given us. We are healers of the psyche, and that first client meeting is where we give that hope, and the healing process begins. I have always believed that and believed that that is how I can relate to all of you.
Individually we are strong, but it is when we are together that we have wrought miracles.
One last thing..please laugh. I had been asked to speak at the AGM of VIEW, Vision Impaired Empowering Women, a support group for New Zealand women who are blind or have low vision. And why? Because during a training session with the Chairperson of said group, I had apparently made her laugh at the way I’d described having tea with condensed milk.
And so, Laugh together. The trick is to find the humour in the little things, the “wet bottom” as poor Jacqui had the misfortune of experiencing on a joint client visit; the dust and cobwebs in our hair, scrambling under a client’s table sorting cables, with Nasim; when on a joint visit with Karen up North, the Magnifier Reader software caused our client’s giant TV screen to produce an upside down display, and we chuckled about doing a headstand to view the screen;
and So Much More..
So laugh, however dampening or worrying the situation.

I have learnt so much from each and everyone of you that I have had the privilege to work with, speak with, eat with, laugh with or just chat with.
I cannot thank you enough. This is not goodbye, for sure.
Stay blessed always,

Signing off one last time..
Bavani Suresh
Adaptive Communications Adaptive Technology Specialist
..
..”

#sareespeak #womenofsareespeak #171 #SS 16/2022

#silk #kalamkari

Life is quite routine and predictable which is good, aside from the occasional dinner meets with friends.
Missing my girls quite a bit.
Hence a new hobby.
A favourite pastime of empty nesters.
So ironic.
In the mornings, when we come to the kitchen,
We see them – not the girls – Wait for it – adorning the rooftops, above the gutters, on the branches.
Pretty maids, oops!, birds, all in a row.
They wait patiently and when we draw the blinds open, they, and this is our humble take,
Perform, a waltz straight out of Johann Strauss’s compositions.
I believe if I were to play the Blue Danube, they would flit, land, twirl, chirp in perfect unison, timing and tune.
I sip my coffee and watch as husband throws some grains, crumbs and
they peck for a minute or two,
Fly off to settle on the boughs,
Rest their little tummies,
Allow their buddies, oops again, birdies to have a turn.
Except for a bully or two there is perfect harmony in their mannerisms.
The larger ones – the pigeons, parrots on trees, mynas and some others whose names I profess not to know but will find out, chide those their size and never the little thrushes, sparrows, finches.
Sharing and the unspoken understanding that there is enough for all.
We do have the pleasure of the company of the occasional two major gatecrashers, magpies who swoop down and scare the group. They then stand guard ensuring no other bird gets to feed.
Not a recommended act to follow.
Bird watching I suppose is like watching fish in an aquarium. Or people watching?Highly entertaining yet so calming.
Lots of lessons learnt by just watching these simple souls.
And so I’ve draped this lovely light silk mustard green kalamkari with a gorgeous pallu of my favourite bird – the Swan surrounded by lotuses. Added bonuses are motifs of the musical instruments I love – veenas, sitars, tablas, mridhangams, horns.
Pictures of birds in comments.

#sareespeak #womenofsareespeak

#172 #SS 17/2022

#kanjivaram #silk #kanjivaramsilk

Yesterday was a long day as in Good long.
Got to bed past 2am the night before, as we’d celebrated husband’s birthday at 12am with a tiny cake and AA and D2. D2 surprised him by knocking on the front door.
AA caught his surprise and happiness on video. We cut the tiny beautifully iced chocolate mud cake, sang, chatted a while. The next day consisted of family time with a temple visit, Vietnamese lunch and Mediterranean dinner.
And with both of us entering the Jurassic phase, the family watched Jurassic World Dominion with lots of popcorn.
Reiterating something I’d written some time ago, after hearing someone mention that Love is Not blind.
That love sees everything, the flaws, the chips and cracks, the dirt.
Love questions, love argues, love digs deep.
So Think about it.
How can love be blind?
Love isn’t.
It’s just that love loves, taking in the nasties, and the not niceties, not necessarily liking or accepting, but trying to work through it.
Loving is hard work.
Sometimes love wants to throw the towel in and walk away, but then because
Love is love.
Love loves. And loves. And loves.

Wishing my best buddy, go to person, punching bag, music man, professor, my movie, walking, cooking partner, my love,
a day and a lifetime of celebration. Told him that just for the day, I’d ignore his dry humour, his driving, his incredibly long pauses after commencing a sentence, and a host of other idiosyncrasies.

Draped this beautiful red kanjivaram silk with gold horizontal vertical threads throughout the body, and gold and green borders and pallu.
A traditional Kancheepuram Araku saree with Mayil Kann borders. Known as a million checks saree!
For a temple function on Thursday evening. Saree purchased for D1’s wedding and worn for the Mangalasnanam/haldi function then (auspicious bathing and turmeric applying ceremony).
Photo credit – D1!💃🏻
More pics in comments.

#sareespeak #womenofsareespeak

#173 #SS 18/2022

#kalamkari #silk #cottonsilk

D2 at the airport earlier this week.
Felt quite down.
Why are partings so tough?
Every time.
Takes getting used to, and I suspect I may never quite get there.
Which bard said it was “sweet sorrow”?
That night, when she’d called to let us know she was safely ensconced in her little studio apartment, I’d felt a little better.
We’d held a celebratory dinner for husband and D2 over the weekend. We’d got Lamprais catered with some vege triangle shaped stuffed rottis.
Lamprais or Lumprice, a derivative of the Dutch word lomprijst, is a Sri Lankan dish introduced by the country’s Dutch Burgher population. It may also have its roots in the Indonesian dish lemper. Lamprais consists of curries with samba rice cooked in coconut milk, wrapped in banana leaves and baked in an oven.
I’d also made cadju curry, the infamous Sri Lankan cashew nut curry with green peas. A Tiramisu birthday cake, some Malaysian kuih muih gifted by a dear niece, and Amul’s RajBhog icecream with fresh fruit were the icings on the cake, quite literally. There was the usual traditional fanfare of husband and D1/D2 smearing cake on their dad’s and D2’s faces, amidst a chase around the table and cheers.
D1 spent the actual birthday with D2 and us, we shopped for husband’s overdue gift and D2’s gift, had a light lunch and A joined us after his match for a delicious Italian meal and TopGun Maverick.
And then I’d fallen quite ill with headaches and a sore tummy. Did RATs, thank goodness they turned out negative.
Back to the general humdrum of life.
Sigh.. and the cycle continues..

Sharing a post I’d written about my darling D2. Waxing lyrical. But don’t we all? When it comes to our children, as my mum would quote a Tamizh proverb, “Kaakaa kunju Ponn Kunju” which translates to ‘Even a crow thinks it’s child is golden’.

“Happy birthday to my second born.
Reminiscing..
You whining about your name having all the letters of the alphabet.
Me retorting that it’d worked out well as I’d called subsets of your name in direct proportion to my displeasure at something you’d done.
Vindhya.
Vindhya Suresh.
Vindhyavasini.
Vindhyavasini Sureshchandra.
Vindhyavasini daughter of Sureshchandra Ramachandra!!!
Thank goodness we’re in a good place now, we’ve migrated to just Vindhya.
Your signature comeback “Stop it, I don’t like it” to being chided, still rings in my ears too. 😎😜.
Celebrating the day you came into my life, my sweet generous compassionate angel.
May you always remain the sweetheart that you are, may you always experience the beauty and goodness you reflect, may you receive in abundance the love that you give❤️💕Love hugs kisses blessings always, Amma and Appa”.

Draped a gorgeous light soft cotton silk Kalamkari with a Prussian blue body covered with mango and flower motifs, a border of dancers in a procession continuing onto an intricate pallu of Krishna, Radha, Gopis, on various musical instruments. Obtained from a friend’s local boutique.
Apt for an evening of class and retrospection..

#sareespeak #womenofsareespeak

#174 #SS 19/2022

#kanjivaram #silk #kanjivaramsilk

I need to write.
I need to post.
Thank goodness I have a Saree to post with, to post about.
These 2 days have been pure gratitude and happiness.
Gratitude for the souls in my life.
Happiness from being
around, with,
surrounded by them.
Spent 2 days on an out of town trip.
With my girl friends.
Blasted music in the car, spoke above the music, ordered Thai take away, far more than we could eat.
Sat around the affogato, red velvet cake and shared our stories, laughed, dropped off to sleep, awoke, showered, climbed into bed and continued chatting like naughty schoolgirls, way past midnight.
Awoke to the aroma of coffee, buttered toast with coconut Sambal, oats.
Showered, dressed, left for the Farmers’ markets. Picked up dips, cheeses, fresh produce, shopped at quaint outlets.
Found a celebrity or two to take photos with. Yes, you read that right. Managed to do that too.
Had a beautiful lunch by the river bank. Great scenery, meal, conversation, company.
On impulse, watched a movie in a beautiful theatre, had butter popcorn and salted caramel popcorn and ice cream.
Chatted all through the drive back, had dinner at a Malaysian joint, washed down with Teh Tarik.
Got dropped off home with my head, heart so light and warm.
Couldn’t stop rattling off to husband about the trip, and showing off my purchases, amidst proclaiming that he was a sweetheart.
The secret to happiness is quite simple really. Tried to elucidate this while having a hot shower just now.
You see, I’m quite selfish – I like being happy.
Who doesn’t?
A sure fire way to be happy is to be surrounded by love and happiness.
And the easiest way to ensure this is to
make people happy,
get them laughing,
force a smile on their faces,
open up, be vulnerable, be honest.
And then happiness becomes infectious, creating a pay it forward kind of atmosphere.
So straightforward –
Happiness begets Happiness.

Draped a saree for a friend’s 60th birthday celebration. Saree gifted by husband 5 years ago. A blue green/turquoise kanjivaram with lilac magenta border, strewn with elephants, legendary yazhis/dragons, large annapakshis/swans while body has diamond shaped buttis.
Paired with its embossed lilac blouse.

Accessorised with Sheer Happiness.

Photo credit : D1 of course!

#sareespeak #womenofsareespeak

#175 #SS 20/2022 #cottonsilk

Guru Poornima.
Rose before dawn.
The standard working day except for making Prasad, having Puja at home.
Guests left just before the witching hour, a quick clean up then off to bed, giving silent thanks to all the Gurus in my life.
Spoke to my Music Guru, it was coincidentally Her 88th birthday too.
Attempted to reply texts from students and friends, while invariably dozing off and deleting what I’d penned.
Have had a splendid week of teaching and learning.
Educating at work,
educating after work, preparing students for a temple fundraiser,
Being educated.

Draped a simple much loved grass green cotton saree with mustard borders and pallu, gold mangoes on border. Easy to drape, easy to do work in. Got husband to hastily click a shot just before bedtime. Sans lipstick powder. Hence the sad state of the photo shoot.

Belated Guru Poornima Greetings to all of you.
We all have, have had, will have Gurus in our lives.
If we yearn enough, the Guru finds us when we are open to learning.
And if we remain open and alert and grateful, we will notice blessings and signs.
We need to not hold on to these blessings but to pass them on.
So that others may receive, be full and may pass it on.
For the love and grace overflows, and too much to hold on to.
Imagine an environment of selfless giving beings.
As George Bernard Shaw says, “.. a splendid torch which I have got a hold of for the moment, and I want to make it burn as brightly as possible before handing it on to future generations.”
May we all be grateful for the knowledge, guidance and blessings of our Gurus.
Having been illuminated by our Guru(s), may we light another’s candle, and pray that other candles are lit from the ones that have been lit.
Stay blessed always.

#sareespeak #womenofsareespeak

#176 #SS 21/2022

#kanjivaram #silk #kanjivaramsilk

Back with a vengeance.
No wrong word.
Didn’t mean that.
Or maybe in a good way.
Could vengeance be good?
Stop! Bavani!
Rambling alert.
Meant am going to post sarees back to back as I have been draping them back to back.
Have been hit by a severe strain of
Writer’s Block.
Recuperating.
Hence the mutated strain,
Ramble-july-22
D1 and her music dance students were invited to perform at a temple’s AGM in Hamilton, a town about an hour and a half’s drive from Auckland. A young architect friend, a student who’d recently arrived from India to complete post grad studies, accompanied us.
Great performance, no, I’d prefer to say an Aradhana, a love offering to Lord Balaji and all Divine Beings.
Children sang a Varnam in two speeds, then sang for a dance by two junior students. Husband’s student accompanied them well on the mridhangam. D1 took over, sang for a dance by an intermediate student, after which she rendered some krithis and a thillana. Husband and I accompanied her on the mridhangam and veena respectively.
All in all a lovely afternoon.
Went on to a friend’s home for refreshments then drove home. On the drive home we declared that our hearts and tummies were full, saturated 🙂.
Once we got home, put all instruments, appliances away, naughty us had some quick home cooked spicy noodles.
Draped this gorgeous veldhari gold striped bright blue Kanjivaram silk with wide maroon and gold borders and pallu with Yazhis and Annapakshis (mythological creatures and swans).
From my wedding trousseau 30+ years ago. Heavy but an easy drape with a beautiful flow.
Photo clicked just before leaving for Hamilton, hence the bloopers in comments. An additional one of me on the Veena in comments clicked by the organisers.

#sareespeak #womenofsareespeak

#177 #SS 22/2022

#silk #tussar #tussarsilk#linen

#monthlytheme #GoingSolo

Remember I said I was back with a vengeance.
I meant a draping posting spree.
The best I could manage this cold rainy windy winter.
Draped a gorgeous ash? cream? gold beige? linen tussar silk Kerala Saree, kasavu? for a temple fundraiser a fortnight ago, then redraped it a few days ago for a home Puja.
The Saree has Kerala motifs – homes, temples, musical instruments, Vamana’s umbrella, in gold, black, ash. Gifted by a dear friend Kirithika Kiki ❤️
The photos clicked on the music programme day could not be used except for one with my students, in which I look like a golliwog having a bad hair day. In comments.
Managed to get some clicks after redraping days later, a calmer, neater look. Excuse the large foot sticking out. I intended for it to be an artistic display of nail polish and minji/toe ring😎. Massive fail as my girls would exclaim.

Going solo.
This month’s theme.
Roald Dahl’s book?
Being independent?
But it is said,
No man is an island.
Meaning none of us are self sufficient. We Humans are social animals – We need others to feed off, feed on, to complement, supplement us.
Yet our journey is our own.
We are born alone, we die alone.
And so I liken this Going Solo to
Being Alone.
Not Being Lonely
But
Being Alone.
Going Within.
We churn out our best work when we go Solo, we are left to our own devices, we go within, we are alert, mindful, we concentrate, and attack tasks with single mindedness.
We brew our best coffee or chai masala when we are first in the kitchen in the wee hours of the morning, with only ourselves and our inner thoughts for company.
We sing our best in the shower.
We play an instrument and get lost in it when only we hear and no one else does.
We make the simplest most delicious paruppu or rasam, alone, solo then share this with the rest of the household.
We collect inspiration from around us, then go solo, go within, soul search, to produce Art be it music, painting, writing, cooking, anything that is a product of our being.
This is my take on Going Solo.
Am I making sense?
What are your thoughts?

#sareespeak #womenofsareespeak

#178 #SS 23/2022

#silk #kanjivaram #kanjivaramsilk

When I got husband to click my shots, the conversation went somewhat like this :
Me – please please please take my photo ah.
A side note – Malaysians utter words in threes, it’s as if to place emphasis on the intended action 😎.
He – we’ll take it when we come home.
Me – no no no! Take now la! I’ll look like Chandramukhi by the time I get home.
Side note again – we add la to soften the command or situation.
He – ok. Where do you want to sit?
Me. Scurrying around my living room looking for a different seat to sit on. The Outdoors being too cold and misty and the stairs quite damp. Finally settled down on a much photographed wooden chair.
He – moving back, bending knees to ensure he captures ALL of bountiful me in the photo. Seats himself on jute stool and proceeds to click but before that as with most males of my era who I believe aspire to have death wishes on their heads,
He – Same Saree?
Trails off as he notes my indignant expression, clearer than ever, through the camera lens.
Me – So what? I love this Saree. So many beautiful memories la. And I waxed lyrical about our wedding reception in late December 1991 when I’d first draped it. I’d had my hair up in a stylishly messy bun with purple pink flowers.
Will look for a photo and post in comments.
Anyway, to cut a long story short, he clicked some standing and sitting shots.
And his comment got me thinking.
About #Irepeatmysarees
And #nationalhandloomday (India)
Yes I do drape the same sarees.
Yes I do look for the same sarees, that get me comfortable.
I love the fabric, the flow, the emotion attached to the Saree.
Each time the experience is different, I sometimes get noticed and complimented, sometimes not.
But, always,
Some new memory gets attached to a Saree fold pleat, a little of the pallu, a gold thread, an mm of border.
When I’d first draped it, I was a young bride, bright eyed and bushy tailed, with hopes, dreams of a wonderful life ahead, and those hopes and dreams changed, sometimes got lost, improved, reimagined, reworked over the years.
Years later at other weddings, important events, I tend to reminisce about my first drape of this beauty and subsequent drapes and as I do so, more memories attach themselves to the intertwining of the warps and wefts.
And just like this, at 16, I’d draped Mum’s wondrous mystical Benarasi silk wedding Saree in Ramar Patchai and vermillion borders and pallu with peacocks and swans strutting on the pallu.
For dance performances, whenever I took on the role of Aandaal. I remember feeling I was the young saint, swaying to MS Amma’s (MS Subbulakshmi) rendition of Shri Rangapura Vihaara. And in the same Saree, I’d been a Goddess in a temple in a Ramayana dance drama, wherein Seetha and her friends had come to worship, before the Swayamvara.
I may have digressed, as I am wont to do.
All I need to stress is that we should never underestimate the power of draping, redraping this beautiful garment, which has the ability to create, recreate, sustain and muster up beautiful experiences and memories.
So the next times someone says “same Saree”,
Either retort or Just smile knowing what a blessing it is to redrape such treasures.
As as I couldn’t drape a handloom on National Handloom Day, here is my contribution –
A 30+ year old Kanjivaram silk Handloom treasure in bright purple, with gold Veldhari stripes on the body, with pink and gold borders and pallu, with flowers and mangoes on the borders and pallu and additional tear drop like gold buttis along the borders. Draped for a wedding of a bright eyed bushy tailed young couple on Saturday morning.

#sareespeak #womenofsareespeak

#179 #SS 24/2022

#silk #kanjivaram #kanjivaramsilk

Varalakshmi Viratham.
Friday. D1’s first.
Her mother in law and I had presented her with Devi’s Mugam/face the evening before, being an auspicious Poornima/full moon evening. We set up the altar and got organised for the next day.
A beautiful celebration.
Prayers. Fasting. Great vibes.
With her beautiful loving mother in law and me.
A full on work day but started very early so was able to finish early. Got some tamarind sevai/rice vermicelli done and tempered sabudana/sago for Prasadam.
Got 5 types of fruits to represent the 5 elements.
Prepped trays of sarees, kumkumam, manjal, betel nuts, flowers, fruits to gift the two ladies.
D1’s MIL had already started the Paal Payasam/Milk Rice Khmer on the stove. She’d also prepared lemon sevai and creamy curd rice.
Had a peaceful Puja, just the 3 of us with son in law too. Husband and D1’s younger brother in law visited later.
So why do we Fast?
I believe, to each his own.
No judgement.
Listen, let’s be honest, to ourselves at least.
Much of what we do, even if we say it’s for others, it is for ourselves.
Or at least, the ‘good’ we do or put out there is for our self esteem, our mental and physical well being.
Fasting is not Starvation. It’s not an obligation. It means control of the 5 sensory and 5 motor senses. We can define our fast and stick to it, and in so doing, we aim to maintain our minds, bodies in a Sathwic state. In this state, it is easy for us to project happiness, positivity for the wellbeing of ourselves and those around us.
And so when I fasted for Varalakshmi Nombu, I must add, I was a little selfish. I wanted to feel light and happy and good so that this would cascade into blessings and good for my family, loved ones and others. 😀

Draped a 30+ year old bottle green kanjivaram silk with maroon and gold borders and pallu. Another much loved treasured gem from my wedding trousseau. Wore it for the first time at my house/apartment warming a month or so after marriage. There is an oft related tale about the original blouse😆. For another time. Here I decided to mismatch it with a green red cotton kalamkari blouse, much to D1’s chagrin.
Carrying a plate with bowls of Prasadam en route to the altar.
Photo credit : dear son in law. More photos in comments.