#sareespeak #womenofsareespeak #silk

#SS 30/2021 #100

In my last post, I wore a Mother’s hat.
Today, I shall exchange it for a Daughter’s one.
Sharing a post from 2 years ago.
When my mother was visiting NZ.
Hopefully will visit her soon, once borders open, bubbles are created, quarantines are removed. Dare to dream, eh?

Mother’s Day 2019.
I suppose I am to be politically correct by writing about Mother’s Day. It started off well enough, and ended relatively alright enough. Gifts, hugs, kisses were exchanged, The weather was terrible though.

My mother is here with me in NZ. On holiday. My mother in law, a beautiful selfless soul, passed away a year ago but hubby’s older sister is also here. My younger sister, Thaya from Perth has flown to London to be with her older daughter on her 21st birthday, while my youngest sister Shuba has gone to Perth to be with her older daughter and Thaya’s children. What a confusing state of affairs.

Why, you may ask, do we do it?

Why, do we uproot ourselves from one place and transport ourselves to the other end of the world?

Because we love. Because, for us Mothers, it’s not that one day on the year where we are loved and we love. It’s an everyday, minute by minute, microsecond by nanosecond affair for us.
On this day, we strive even more, unconsciously, to mother our families.

We exchanged gifts, we laughed, we ate together, we looked out for each other, we looked after each other, and in the midst of this, when my daughter had a meltdown because she couldn’t access her online exam from home and she had to drive to the uni during a thunderstorm, I waited with baited breath until she texted me to say she was alright. I drove my second girl to a concert and had to fetch her close to midnight. My elder girl accompanied me, and was quite firm with me when I then had a meltdown as roads were closed and I couldn’t get to where my younger one was waiting for me with around 1% battery charge on her phone. My older girl had had a difficult day, yet had come out with me in the pouring rain to get some Mexican takeaway and to fetch my younger daughter. My younger one excitedly raved on about the concert, showing me videos.

As the day drew to a close, I realised that these were the rewards of motherhood. A daughter wanting to spend time with her mother, on a car drive through the bitter rain and traffic, daughter, mother, aunt, grandmother, digging into hot spicy nachos, enchiladas, quesadillas while watching Secret Superstar, which ironically depicts, in the face of sadness and cruel abuse, the saving grace of a mother’s love; a daughter playing back videos of the concerts, explaining scenarios behind songs.
I fingered the rose gold Pandora charm given to me that morning from one daughter, folded away underwear and socks, yes, exactly that, from my oh-so-sensible second girl, binged on a decadent lemon glazed slice of cake baked by her, and patted myself on the back. It was a day like any other. What we have here, is a great thing going, the girls and I.

Back to the present.
Draped a cream silk saree, with olive green and gold borders and pallu for a first time mom’s daughter’s first birthday party.

#sareespeak #womenofsareespeak #silk

#kanjivaram

#kanjivaramsilk

#SS 29/2021 #99

Happy Mother’s Day to Each and Everyone of you in this group. You have the capacity to love, give selflessly, you are therefore a Mother.
Mother’s day 2021.
Much of the world is in lockdown.
A few days ago, redeemed an almost expired due to lockdown, spa voucher gifted by my younger one, for my 2020 birthday.
Am still bruised and broken for having the knots hammered out of my back, neck, shoulders, legs, feet.
But had a wonderful idea.
Yes, when one is face down on a massage table, unable to breathe, red in the face,  trying to concentrate on one’s breaths and not shoulder knot no. 15 being kneaded out, these epiphanies do happen.
So once it was over, coconut oil drenched me, went over to reception to purchase two gift vouchers for the girls.
And on the morning of Mother’s Day, I woke them up with a flat white and mocha, and a golden orange envelope each.
Happy Mother’s Day, I squealed, to the darlings who’d made me a mom.
Watched them squirm in unease that I’d got to them first.
Loved loved the reaction.
Anyway, going to spend some quality time with the girls this evening.
Managed to get some shots last night with my Reasons for being a mom, before a performance. Vindhya on veena, Anusha on vocals with another sibling musician duo on violin and vocals.
Am in a double? triple? tone purplish bluish pinkish kanjivaram silk, with gold and pink, yellow, green stripes on pallu and borders.
Daughter#1 is in a blue green and pink benarsi silk, Daughter#2 in a light blue and pink embroidered organza saree.
Husband clicked some good shots, after being chided by girls, and finally, after they positioned the phone in his hands.
Got home and got a quick solo click.

#sareespeak #womenofsareespeak #linensilk #linen #SS 28/2021 #98

This is a post,
In Admiration,
And Celebration
of
my beautiful Sareeing Sakhis
who
bravely don sarees,
amidst this horrific pandemic.
I read each post, tinged with sadness, yet also positivity.
Covid has hit hard, close to home for so many, yet they pick themselves up, envelop themselves in the Saree’s embrace,
and plod on.
I sit here, in my beautiful country, watching news channels, churning out sadness after sadness.
I think of my mum, sisters, sisters-in-law in different continents, and wonder when I will physically meet them.
I call my mum, and speak about food, friends, her grandchildren.
I video chat with my sisters, one at work, one in her kitchen or garden.
I can do nothing except pray, hope, offer some monetary support, put out some positive vibes..
And Dive into,
Bury myself in,
Work, Home, Music.
So, for a change
Decided to visit a friend.
Draped my favourite teal blue linen silk, with royal blue checked borders, white and teal striped pallu.
Looks like our clear blue wintry morning sky, in certain lighting.
Absolutely smooth and comfy, an easy drape.
My first linen, purchased some years ago, when I went to get two sarees for my girls,
And rewarded myself for the effort,
with an additional two sarees.
Daughters firmly told me to post a single shot, but
Vanity in my old age,
and
Rule #6
have got the better of me.

#sareespeak #womenofsareespeak #artsilk #SS 27/2021 #97

Went away on a short vacation to a quaint quiet beach town.
Great family time.
Too cold to swim.
Lots of walks.
Beautiful waterfall, aptly named Bridal Veil. A small creek, too small to be a river, a massive drop off a cliff, and glorious veils of water cascading down, onto the river below with full force. Photo in comments.
Packed a cotton saree.
But..
Chickened out.
Cold, wet, windy.
Ended up in culottes, raincoat, the works.
Will take a ‘rain’check on draping of said saree.
Got home a day early.
Back to work,  classes.
During the week,
Had classes with my Guru. Internet issues, video delays, class wasn’t as good as it should have been. Felt quite sad, inadequate. As she was hearing something quite different to what I was playing.
Had classes with students. A pick me up. The enthusiasm of the young.
Taught them their second varnam. Went through simple gamakams/nuances in the pallavi/first verse.
Demonstrated how as they progress, they would incorporate more gamakas, to sound like a vocalist. More than one note on a fret, sliding, shaking, pulling the strings. Then, went through some scales/alankarams in that raga in 3 speeds.
A joy to see them lapping it up. I could see they were floored, in a great way. I must have raised my voice here and there, because the parents looked sombre when they walked in to carry the instruments after class. Said they were eavesdropping outside, worried, as they thought I was telling the children off for not practising. Told them I had probably got carried away with the excitement of the lesson. And that the children had been practising and had played well.
What a comparison, contrast.
One over cyberspace.
One face to face.
Different lesson scenarios.
Different outcomes.
Anyway, felt pretty ‘adequate’ after the children’s lesson.
The Power of Music
And..
A Good Class.
Draped this brightest of pinks art silk Saree, with brown, blue, white flowers on borders and pallu. Blouse is saree’s, brown, blue, white flowers.
An easy, flowing drape, like the class.

#sareespeak #womenofsareespeak

#kanjivaram #handloom #kanjivaramsilk

#paalumpazhamum #kottadi

#SS 25/2021 #95

Today is THE day.
The day something which started
on a whim,
of one Visionary,
who wasn’t aware she was a Visionary then, a selfless whim,
a selfless Visionary,
blew up,
in a good way,
in huge proportions,
in 5 years.
The 5th birthday of this lovely group, Saree Speak.
A forum for
us women,
by women
Wherein we are happy,
have made friends, admirers,
a therapeutic platform on which we are able to speak our hearts, minds, souls. And for this, I am absolutely grateful. Lots of love dear Vini and all of you here.
Our challenge today, too, is an uplifting positive one – to name 5 things we love about ourselves. It could have been 5 sarees we love, or 5 unique places we sareed, but No.
Vini and her cohort thought long and hard and came up with a simple universal truth.
Self love.
Yes,
Because charity begins at home, with us;
Because how can we give off what we don’t possess.
So we learn to love ourselves, warts and all, be confident without being arrogant, and exude that love to one and all.
Here’s my list. Thought long and hard about how to word this without seeming like The Universal Ego. Then reminded myself, am not being egoistic, but am calling a spade a spade.
I so love

1. My quirky, family-find-it-irritating sense of humour. My ability to laugh at myself, at life, with and not at people.
2. My ability to strike a rapport with people of all ages, and in different areas of my life, at work with my clients – children, teenagers, the elderly, my music students, people I meet generally.
3. My eyebrows, big teeth and crooked fingers. Yes, I can wiggle my knuckle bones and bend my fingers at weird angles.
4. My sensitivity to people’s emotions, the environment, atmosphere around me.
5. My ability to see beauty and positivity in little things. Ok ok, when I am in a good mood.
   May I please add one more? 5b? Or 5.1?
   I love that I am courageous and am able to get out of my comfort zone to try something new. This could just be a getting-old-nothing-to-lose thing. This does not include roller coasters.

Anyway, my loves. I am what I am because I am surrounded by people I love, and who love me, you included.

Draped in a fantabulous saree. My choice, my gift to myself, purchased last year. Was going to wear this to distribute cards for daughter’s nichyathartham but Covid lockdown had other plans for us.
A gorgeous Kanchipuram silk with pure silver Jari,
A Paalum Pazhamum Kottadi, literally translates to milk and fruits.
Green, orange, red, mustard checks.
Orange gold pallu.
Orange borders lined with green, red, gold.
Weaved in the traditional Korvai method.
Decided to drape it to celebrate
Today,
New Beginnings.
Celebrating what has been and what will be.
Better than before.
Happy 5th Birthday Saree Speak.
Happy Tamizh New Year.
இனிய தமிழ் புத்தாண்டு நல்வாழ்த்துக்கள் (Iniya Tamizh Puthaandu Nalvazhthukkal).
Happy Vishu.
Happy Sinhala New Year.
Happy Vaisakhi.
Happy Gudi Padwa.
Happy Ugadi.
Happy Ramadan.
First day of the month of Chittirai.
And as per my previous post,
Let’s make a wishlist, not resolutions.
Let’s wish for peace.
Within.
So that we remain unaffected by the Without.
Love, blessings always.
PS – 18 selfies with camera timer as daughter#2 was in the middle of an online lecture, husband nowhere to be seen.
But photos on stairs are last resort photos by him.
Managed to whittle it down to two.

#sareespeak #womenofsareespeak

#silk #handloom

#SS 24/2021 #94

A post BEFORE Tamizh New Year, the first day of Chittirai. Known as Putthandu or Puthuvarudam. Or Vishu, Vaisakhi, Gudi Padwa. On or around 14th April on the Gregorian calendar.
A post also before Saree Speak’s 5th birthday.
Dear Vini has asked that we share 5 things we love about ourselves.
That in itself displays the selflessness of this forum’s founder. No hidden agenda. Just that we highlight, uplift, celebrate ourselves,
Which I will do tomorrow.
Today, is a day of reflection.
Pre New Year.
A making of a wish list. I say wish because I don’t want to make resolutions.
I wish for so many things. I wish to write, to publish, to cook, to feed, to laugh, to see my family smile, to hear my friends laugh, to inspire, to create legacies, to make music, to hug my mum, my sisters..not necessarily in that order.
I wish to be happy,
And for that,
I need to be at peace,
For I think we all know that,
When we are peace inside, it radiates outside. And we are able to come to terms with whatever’s taking place around us.
Sharing a quote apt for my age and times (actress Cherie Lunghi) : “I think it’s nice to age gracefully. OK, you lose the youth, a certain stamina and dewy glow, but what you gain on the inside as a human being is wonderful: the wisdom, the acceptance and the peace of mind. It’s a fair exchange.”
Draped a beautiful handloom silk in lovely autumnal rust, with geometric korvai brocade in dark green on borders and pallu; gold and green mango buttis on body. For class then a dinner to send off a young friend going overseas. Gifted by husband at an exhibition just before Tamizh New Year in 1993. Thanks so much Ratna Vasudevan akka for helping with the selection. Unmatched with a brown and orange checked cotton blouse with gold and orange borders on sleeves. An additional photo shows me in a 1993 click with the saree’s actual blouse.

#sareespeak #womenofsareespeak

#cotton #cottonsilk

#SS 23/2021

#93

Disclaimer.
My usual.
A post from my personal newsfeed (old photo in comments) on World Autism Awareness Day, followed by Ramblings and Ruminations.
One and the same.
Rambling Ruminations.
Ruminating Rambles.
Couldn’t post it in SS as that would’ve meant flouting rule #5.
Post : “I read ‘For the Love of Anne’ when I was 12. I was deeply affected by Anne’s story. I cried with her parents and rejoiced when she made breakthroughs, however small.
Anne was autistic.
I sometimes believe we are all on the spectrum in varying degrees.
Jerry Newport remarked “I know of nobody who is purely autistic, or purely neurotypical. Even God has some autistic moments, which is why the planets spin”.
I also believe everything’s a matter of perspective.
Who is allowed to judge who? Who has been given permission to say A is perfect and B is not? Or that C is normal and D’s a misfit?
Apparently Einstein and Newton were autistic. Yet genius pulsed through their veins. Einstein said “Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid”.
So, today, being World Autism Awareness Day, let’s celebrate #autismawareness and #LightItUpBlue by wearing blue.
For the friends I know, and for those I don’t, their families, their children,
For autism.
An old photo of me in a blue linen saree, seated on the edge of my tiny kidney shaped lotus pond, with bubbles around me.
Let’s not burst these bubbles, representing autistic persons, with our insensitivity and ignorance.
Let’s instead, come together, to provide a non judgemental, accepting environment so that these bubbles can rise and rise, ultimately achieving their full potential.”
Autism. A serious developmental disorder that impairs the ability to communicate and interact.
Let’s rephrase.
An inability to communicate and interact. Most have this impairment.
Spouses, after aeons of being married;
Parents, Children, Friends.
It is so easy to slip into a “together but not together” mode of existing side by side.
So let’s not judge. Anyone. Impaired or not or their parents, friends, families.
Now for my daily scribbles.
A frustrating fortnight. I pride myself on being positive, nothing fazes me, the sky is always blue even if it’s grey, the grass green, when parched.
Yet, I was blindsided.
Family unwell.
Ups, downs.
One grumpy, irritable home.
Work too, overwhelming.
Didn’t want to write anything for fear of it being a tad on the dark side.
Touch wood, all are mending, have mended.
Met some lovely clients I had the privilege of supporting, ranging from a teenager to a 90 year old.
Their blessings and satisfaction have been healing.
Chats, walks, meals with angelic friends.
A trip to Crystal Mountain.
A dinner and a heartwarming chat with a young friend.
Rejuvenating.
Feeling much like my old avatar.
Draped a midnight blue cotton silk with gold and magenta brocade borders, temple korvais, gold and pink pallu, gifted by a student during a Navarathri.
For Autism. Better Late than Never.
And for a class with my teacher.
And a quick drive to a peaceful temple.
Am sticking to the rules again. Rule#6.
Edited.
Dear sakhis, I must apologise for some of what I have written in this post. My intentions are not to underestimate or trivialise the challenges of autism. A friend pointed this out to me, when I said most of us have this inability to communicate. She is correct. So let’s work together to raise awareness and acceptance of this largely misunderstood condition. God bless.

#sareespeak #womenofsareespeak

#kanjivaram #handloom #silk #kanjivaramsilk

#SS 22/2021 #92

Disclaimer – big words. Please use Google Translate if you need to 🙊😎

A week of rehearsals with intermediates and seniors.
And Checks.
A music accompaniment for a temple performance.
Or rather, an Offering.
Panguni Uthiram.
And Ekambreshwar Kamakshi Kalyanam/wedding.
Anusha worked on her little dance and vocal students.
Suresh, on his aspiring young mridhangam artistes.
Me, with Vindhya and my veena students.
The result was a Divine Alliance interspersed with vocals, veena and thani avarthanam (creative percussion).
Inviting the Groom, the Bride, the Kannikadhanam/Kanyadaan,Tying of the Thali/Mangalsutra, Exchanging of Garlands.
All to the music of nottuswarams, bhajans, krithis and light semi classical pieces.
Vainikas dressed in various shades of blue.
Draped a paalum pazhamum handloom silk. Literally translates to milk and fruits. In a traditional checkered pattern of blues with deep bluish purple and gold borders and pallu.
A quick click after the programme, as attempting a photo shoot while instruments and equipment were being loaded into the booth, would have had me reeling from their disapproving stares. Added some of me immersed in the moment, in comments.

#sareespeak #womenofsareespeak #cottonsilk

#SS 21/2021 #91

A week of rehearsals.
For a weekend of concerts.
And Checks.
Spoiler Alert.
Wait for next post, please.

An attempt to train a young student for her maiden accompanist role. Some Zoom sessions, some face to face.
Not usually done as accompanying artistes are usually violinists.
She accompanied, on the Veena, her vocalist mum’s students, a varnam in two speeds, an assortment of krithis and light semi classical pieces.
Attended the programme on Saturday morning, dress code for the group being white and red.
A successful attempt.
With the usual mic balancing issues.
Photo shows a proud teacher draped in a red and white checked cotton silk saree, with red and gold bolders and pallu.
Pristine serene white,
Crazy red checks.
Against a backdrop of my little pool, colourful plants and calm, almost asleep Ganesha.
Oops, He’s hiding behind me, however, Mr Super Pig, bright and orange, seems to be enjoying the photo shoot.

#sareespeak #womenofsareespeak #cotton

#SS 20/2021 #90

Back to my regurgitation-of-life writings.
A full on week.
As always.
Work, Classes, Workshops with some lovely final year optometry students. Office, home visits, long long drives. Long 2 digit km 3 digit minute walks across parks, reserves.
This Post is about Worry. And Buddies.

Took a flexi day off to rejuvenate.

Spent the morning at a doctor’s appointment. Not mine.
Home.
Twiddled my thumbs and gingerly opened laptop.
A quick peek at my emails and calendar.
Which I could have accomplished with my phone.
But phone was on charge as it had been overused, mis-used, ab-used by bored me at the doctor’s.
The peek turned out to be a 2 hour stint of non flexi work.
Realised with a gasp.
Moved from work table to living room.
Got 4 days of laundry folded.
While watching Disney+.
Not put away though.
No.
Piled on one armchair.
Piles.
Of differing heights.
Perched precariously on arms and seat.
It had taken 4 days to journey from guest room which no longer looks like an immaculate guest room with white cotton sheets, and well dusted side tables, sills.
To land on living room floor in front of the TV.
Now the Wait.
For the piles to return to their rooms.
Then their cupboards.
Lunch. Re-re-heated food.
Dental appointment with another family member.

And as I complete this rambling post, in the specialists’ clinic, I think,
I should have written about
Worry. And Buddies.
Probably in my next post.

Draped a simple handloom. A green
mustardy Kanchi cotton. Fresh green striped body, with mustard and gold borders and pallu, gold mangoes on borders. Matching mustard with gold mangoes blouse. A reminder that it still seems like summer, even though it’s autumn.